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Polar Opposites
Copyright © 2005, Jacquelyn Priskorn

Synopsis
Why do penguins mate for life?

Original Production: Heartlande Theater Co., Auburn Hills, MI, June 24, 2006
Directed by Karey Hart

Characters
MAN: (Jeff Priskorn)

WOMAN: (Maggie Patton)


A MAN wearing a tuxedo with tails sits in the center of a circle made with rocks. A WOMAN enters wearing a similar tuxedo. The Man does not rise to greet her.

MAN
Well, well, well! It's about time!

WOMAN
Don't even start with me.

MAN
I don't suppose you even thought to bring me anything, did you?

WOMAN
Look, you know how it is out there—

MAN
My memory's a bit foggy. You see, I've been sitting here for the last few weeks watching our child!

He lifts up a coattail to reveal a large egg.

WOMAN
(softening a bit)
How's she been?

MAN
Not a peep.

WOMAN
Please don't be mad at me. Traffic was bad out there... a sea of black and white, I tell you. I mean, everyone was honking their brains out. Why do they even bother? Like that sound is supposed to make traffic move? Honk! Honk! Honk! What? I'm still in the same place I was before? But that's impossible. I honked!

MAN
As fascinating as this is—

WOMAN
When I finally got out there, it was a madhouse! It was like the end of the world. I was lucky to get as much krill as I did and I don't normally care for krill this time of year. But when things get like that, well, you take what you can get, mister.

MAN
Fine, but can—

WOMAN
But the worst part is, Geraldine got eaten! By a seal!

MAN
Who's Geraldine?

WOMAN
Who's Geraldine? Come on! You remember Geraldine!

MAN
No, I can't say that I can.

WOMAN
She used to live just over there. Nested with Franklin.

MAN
Franklin?

WOMAN
Come on! You used to complain that they were stealing rocks from us!

MAN
I did?

WOMAN
I can't believe this! Here I am in mourning over the loss of my very best friend Geraldine and you can't even remember who she is!

She begins to cry.

MAN
Well, what did she look like?

Woman stares at Man as if to say, "Are you kidding me?"

All content copyright © 1997-2017, Jacquelyn Priskorn.