Gemini: Lessons in Self-Love
Copyright © 1999, Jacquelyn Priskorn
Two soul mates wonder if they could be any closer. They decide to live together, in ONE body. The unfortunate person they become is very confused and is desperate to find true love.
Original Production: Heartlande Theatre Co., Birmingham, MI, April 1, 2000
Directed by Stephanie L. Nichols
SOUL 1: male or female, ageless (Stacy Cole)
SOUL 2: male or female, ageless (Thomas Hoagland)
BYRON WINKELSCHNITZ: male game show host, faux youth (Wayne Nichols)
LIBERTY: male or female, 20-40 (Maggie Patton)
BARTENDER: male or female, 20-60 (non-speaking) (James P. Hazen)
BARFLY: male or female, 20-40 (Wayne Nichols)
GROCERY CLERK: male or female, 20-40 (James P. Hazen)
Characters may be double cast. Gender roles are not an issue!
Workshopped: The Sidewalk Theatre Co., Burbank, CA, February 2002
Staged reading: Steal Beam Theatre, St. Charles, IL, January 12, 2003
Directed by Merel Marine
Soul 1/Liberty: Stacie Steinke
Soul 2/Liberty: Mike Kolodziej
Byron/Bartender/Barfly/Grocery Clerk: Ed Klemm
Stage Directions: Debbie Donovan
No, really, it's fine. It's just, I was wondering if you wanted to try one more lifetime?
Oh, I don't know—
You don't have to if you don't want to... It's just, I've heard about other couples trying this and it really changed their relationships.
Not going to earth in a desperate, romantic search as two lost souls looking to become one, but—
As just one person.
BLACKOUT. A bell rings. Quick switch to game show host in spot.
...She's a Gemini who likes quiet dinners by candlelight and monster truck rallies, let's hear it for Liberty!
Applause. LIBERTY enters shyly at first, then smiles and waves seductively. She sits on a stool by the host.
Liberty, what is it you look for in the perfect date?
Please, call me "Mr. Winkelschnitz."
I like someone who can make me laugh, but can hold a serious conversation about world affairs. Someone who can take me to an art museum and maybe get me backstage passes to an AC/DC concert that same night. So, uh—I guess you can say I don't know what I want, Byr—Mr. Winkelschnitz. That's why I'm here.
Okay! Good answer! Let's meet the lucky contestants vying for a date with you today! First, we have an Aries from Ocean City, Maryland who likes jazz and R & B music and fast cars, let's hear it for Drew!
A bell rings. Switch to Liberty at a bar, very drunk and talking to a slightly disinterested BARTENDER.
So, I figured, I had three dates to choose from, how could I lose? Well, I lost. All I got was a home version of the game and this lousy watch. And look.
(She shoves her wristwatch under the Bartender's nose.)
Mickey's flipping me off! Bastard.
Bartender shrugs and walks away. BARFLY approaches.
Hey, baby. What's your sign?
Oh. That's a new one.
Barfly is crushed and turns away. Bell rings. Barfly approaches again.
Hey, baby. What's your sign?
"Trespassers will be shot."
"Slippery when wet."
"Parking in rear"!
Liberty stands, smacking her own butt. Barfly is terrified and runs off.
I'm so lonely.