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Disarming Prince Charming
Copyright © 1998, Jacquelyn Priskorn

Synopsis
Summer love is confusing for 2 college girls.

Characters
LOUANN: female, 20s

PEGGY: female, 20s

BRADLEY: male, 20s


LOUANN
I don't know what you see in him. I mean, he used to date Suzi Slater...

BOTH GIRLS
Bitch.

PEGGY
(imitating SUZI)
Hi, I'm Suzi. That's S-U-Z-I...

LOUANN
The girl is twenty years old and still dots her "I's" with little hearts!

PEGGY
One of these days I'm going to accidentally run her over with my car—seven times. Ugh! She is such a Princess Pretty Girl! Oh! Look at me! Don't I have perky boobies! Oh!—

BRADLEY enters.

BRADLEY
Shit!

LOUANN
Uh, hey Brad... what's wrong?

BRADLEY
Suzi Slater just pulled up.

BOTH GIRLS
Shit!

LOUANN
Don't take this the wrong way, Brad, but I hate that bitch.

BRADLEY
Tell me about it.

He lights up a cigarette. LouAnn looks at Peggy behind his back miming her disgust of smoking. Peggy suppresses laughter and shrugs.

LOUANN
Hey, is that the lighter Peggy gave you for your birthday?

Peggy hits her.

BRADLEY
Huh?
(Looks at lighter.)
Oh, no. I think I lost it.
(Glances at Peggy.)
Sorry Pegs.

PEGGY
Oh, well, you know... it's probably... somewhere. Right? I mean... well... 's okay.

LOUANN
Maybe it's the one Ross got you...

BRADLEY
So where's Sophie at?

LOUANN
Down there with everyone else building a bonfire. I guess it's part of the welcoming ceremony for the witch.

Bradley cracks a smile.

BRADLEY
You know what's really irritating is that she came here with three garment bags, a shoe trunk, a designer suitcase, and that huge mofo makeup kit of hers.

LOUANN
You're surprised? She hardly brings less than that to school every day.

PEGGY
(laughing)
And she has a big butt.

Silence. He looks at Peggy for a second then stamps out his cigarette.

BRADLEY
I'm going to get a beer, does anybody want anything?

LouAnn gives Peggy a shove.

PEGGY
Ow! I'll go with you.

All content copyright © 1997-2017, Jacquelyn Priskorn.